What Is Libido?

Indeed, What is This Libido?

Libido is a term coined by Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, to describe sexual drive, desire, and energy. Some might get goosebumps seeing Freud's name, but there's no need to run away.

In everyday conversations, libido is often presented as something the body produces on its own, over which you have no direct control, like a matter of too many or too few hormones. However, libido is not a concept independent of you and your happiness. The World Health Organization (WHO) states that libido is related to our physical, mental, emotional, and social health, and even to the culture we are born into, thereby showing us how many parameters influence libido and putting our minds at ease. Various studies take the WHO's validated idea a step further, suggesting that a person's libido can even be affected by the place they spend time with their partner. Our experiences align with those of scientists.

To put it simply, your libido depends not only on your hormones but on many different situations and conditions. If you are healthy and happy, and on top of that, you have an emotionally and physically satisfying relationship, this usually means you don't have a problem with your libido. But what about those who have "high" libido? If some have a lot, others must have little, right? To answer this, we'll need to dig a little deeper.

Which is Better: Too Little or Too Much?

Let's start this section by answering the first question that comes to mind. There is no such thing as "normal/optimal" libido. Each of us has a different standard of living, cultural background, family environment, and psychology. In addition to these external factors, each of our characters is also distinct. This means that our perspectives and expectations regarding sexuality are all different. What we need to understand from this is that the societal pressure for an "ideal libido" is not real.

If we have eased the minds of those who have questions about their daily libido levels, let's now turn to the other side of the coin. For various reasons, your libido, which you considered ideal, may have increased or decreased over the years, and you might be bothered by this. The reason for this, yes, you guessed it right, is not solely related to your hormones.

Low Libido

It's worth noting at the outset that low libido is relative to what level you consider "normal." So, what might be upsetting for you could be a level at which someone else happily continues their sexual life.

Those who experience the symptoms know better, but we'll list them anyway:
Loss of sexual desire for a partner
Stress, anxiety, and indifference towards sexuality.

As we mentioned before, changes in libido can have many different causes, encompassing almost all areas of life. However, if we were to list those cited by the British National Health System:

• Pain during sexual intercourse
• Diabetes
• High blood pressure
• Antidepressant use
• Excessive alcohol and tobacco consumption
• Drug use
• Stress
• Low self-esteem
• Andropause
• Relationship problems
• Interest in partner
• Fatigue
• Insomnia
• Anxiety about not being able to satisfy
• We can directly list sexual diseases and problems.

For women, additionally;

• Pregnancy,
• Birth control methods,
• Menopause can be causes of low libido.

Did you also run out of breath reading that? Let's not forget to add it to the list: lack of physical exercise can also be one of the reasons for low libido.

What to Do?

In fact, the things to do are hidden within the reasons. The important thing, we can say, is to find out which one is causing it. For some of us, an open and heartfelt conversation with our partner and a romantic dinner might solve all problems, while for others, getting rid of bad habits and trying new ways to improve our quality of life could be the solution. Those experiencing low libido due to medication use can consult their doctor and explain this bothering situation to find a remedy. If, despite all this, your libido has not reached the levels you expect, it is beneficial to consult a specialist.

A Libido Fact: Researchers have repeatedly proven that there is no direct relationship between the foods we consume and our libido level. So, we can all stop eating sugary aphrodisiac pastes every night. However, this doesn't mean we shouldn't pay attention to what we eat, of course. Regular and balanced nutrition ensures our body gets the nutrients it needs and we have more energy throughout the day. This helps us perform better in "all areas" of our lives.

High Libido

High libido, at first glance, might not seem like something that could be very bothersome, or even something to be proud of. However, when it starts affecting the flow of life and one can think of nothing but sex, it can be even more dangerous than low libido.

Although sex is an activity where we set rationality aside and act on our impulses, for an individual existing in the modern world, being unable to control their passions and urges can lead to long-term mental, social, and even physical harm.

Here's a checklist for out-of-control libido:

• Inability to restrain or stop sexual desire
• Excessive exposure to pornographic material
• Excessive masturbation
• Using sexuality as an escape from anger, stress, anxiety
• Difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships due to sexual desire
• Inability to get expected satisfaction from non-sexual activities
• Sexual urges negatively affecting areas such as health, intimate relationships, and work

What to Do?

One of the main things that can be done to reduce libido is to channel this energy elsewhere. You can use the energy that fills you during the day by lifting weights, running, or meditating. It wouldn't be bad to become more at peace with your body, would it? If you're not satisfied with your relationship with your partner, you can open up to them about it and find common ground, or you can see a relationship therapist together. If you can't solve high libido on your own, you can consult a doctor and bring your libido back to normal levels for you through medical means.

Misconceptions About Libido

As we mentioned at the outset, libido is a concept that is not easy to discuss in society. However, by not discussing it, many truths about this topic disappear and are replaced by myths. For example, you must have encountered someone who claims men have a higher libido than women. This is not true. Libido is not something you can weigh with scales or measure with a ruler. We've said it many times, but it's our duty to society, so let's repeat it: Libido varies from person to person; it's not something that can be squeezed into a single stereotype or generalized within a broad concept like gender.

Another misconception that bothers those who are trekkers in the "Just Okay" plains rather than mountaineers on the mountain of satisfaction, and is misunderstood by society, is that libido has no connection with orgasm. There could be many reasons why you can't reach the peak, such as constantly repeating the commercial jingle you heard on TV in your head, or not liking the color of your pillow, but libido is not one of them.

To sum up, your libido concerns you and only you, so there's no need to worry about what society or your friend who says "You left the game early" tells you. What matters is your happiness and health. And also your personal care. You take care of yourself, and your care is entrusted to Bonherre.